Tag Archives: day

Doing What Needs to Be Done!

Monday August 29th 2016

It took another 2 hours to get from Sutton to London Blackfriars. Even though we knew we’d have to take the bus, it was still hard. Too much for not enough reward. I was also frustrated about two things I wasn’t getting a response about and it was driving me nuts. There was a guitarist playing at the spot who we’d never seen before. He kept playing and playing until Thoth went over and said we were queuing. He didn’t say when he’d be finished. We both assumed he wouldn’t follow the hour and a half play rule as he’d probably already been playing there for hours beforehand.

After an hour and a half passed. I motioned to him to see if he was done. He kind of mocked my motion as if he wasn’t done. He got out a cigarette and came over to us. I told him it’s normal for people to play an hour and a half, then switch off with someone who is waiting. “Do I look like a normal person?” he said stupidly. I wanted to say, “Yes. I’ve seen your act everywhere in the world.” but instead I said, “It’s just nice to let others play.” For some reason, he did let us play but called us an “American Freak Show.” Who the f*** knows why. I muttered how I didn’t like being called a freak show. What a jerk.

This girl who sings opera came over to watch us. She loves our music. She met Thoth when I’d gone to see James last week. She told us she had arguments with guitarist man. “He plays and plays so he doesn’t have to talk to people and he never wants to share.” she said. So we were right about him. We played less than an hour. Our voices and bodies were too tired. We had crowds for the first half, but they died down after an hour. Oh well. We finished with “Scottish Song” to a crowd of maybe one person, who clapped. I didn’t care because I was happy we did it. “We did it.” I said when we finished, kissing Thoth. We did what we needed to do. We even sold two CDs. We immediately went into the train station to go home, knowing it would take another 2 hours to get back to Sutton. We need to live closer to, or better yet, in Central London when we visit next August. We’ll never play at Blackfriars again, but it did get us through this our first try in London.

We went to a delicious Indian restaurant near home. It was a satisfying ending to a very hard, but very successful day. When we got home, I got two emails with exciting things. I can’t wait to tell you about them.

Sunday August 28th 2016

We decided not to go into the city to play at Blackfriars today. It was cold and rainy and the trains still weren’t running from Sutton, making it a two hour, very boring and seemingly pointless trip. Instead we hung out in the house until 2pm and then went for food and drinks at a pub with Kaja and Emil. I tried not to get upset about not going to play. It was 5pm by the time we were done. The day got away with us. I’m glad. I never enjoy days when we’re not playing and I know we should. We’ll go play tomorrow, even though the trains still won’t be running. Ugh. It’ll be the last time we’ll have to take that trip.

Saturday August 27th 2016

We got out of the house by 2pm. Decent timing, or so we thought. The train from Sutton wasn’t running, again. It didn’t run last Sunday and it took for f***ing ever to get to London Blackfriars. I was pissed off knowing we’d have to take the shaky, vomit-inducing bus instead. I practically threw my violin on the floor I was so mad. I do get upset when things don’t go as planned, and that happens a lot in my life.

We got to Blackfriars at 2pm. It took 2 hours to get there. Ridiculous! We most definitely will be staying nearer to London next time. That kind of long transit makes us miserable. We had to wait another 2 hours to play because the bassist was playing. I was really frustrated. We played an hour and a half. It was ok, but the space isn’t that great for us we’ve found. At least we know now where we need to live and where we shouldn’t play. Next year we’ll audition to play at Covent Garden. That could be the place for us. James and I saw an opera singer there last week and he had a huge crowd. We would blow everyone away.

We walked to Waterloo station to have sushi at Wasabi and then took another 2 hour trip home. That one wasn’t as bad because I took something to keep me from getting motion sick. What would I do without my little Bunny? We can make our way through any problem. We just do what needs to be done!

A Struggling Artist

Tuesday July 12th 2016

I’ve been having a hard few days.

I think it’s important to be doing something that isn’t popular, but God damn it can be immensely discouraging!

Not everything has to be mainstream and successful to be heard. Lots of people love our music, even though it doesn’t exist to mainstream or even underground music lovers. Our music and our art is outside of any genre you could put it in. We’re not Classical music, or Baroque music, or Tribal music. We’re not vocal music, or instrumental music or avant garde or performance art or… Thoth’s Wiki article is under the category “Outsider Musicians” and it doesn’t even talk about Tribal Baroque. Tribal Baroque only exists because we do it. The only things that come up when you look up our name are things we created. Our website, our vlogs, our blogs, etc. We have a documentary, but no one even knows it exists. If we didn’t go out in public and play our music, it wouldn’t exist. It’s incredibly fragile and small and insignificant. I have to keep going and doing and creating despite it all. The most important thing is to create. Fuck it if no one is interested. Most people would have given up a long time ago and done something else. We don’t base our success on outside approval. We base it on our desire to make something we feel is beautiful and are proud of.

It’s amazing how people of all generations have made such incredible art and music in their lives and no one paid attention to them. People would even sneer and make fun of them. It seems that all great artists are outsiders in their lifetimes and only find recognition when their dead. Great art is never understood when it exists. It’s too bad really! Thoth is alive now. I am alive now. Tribal Baroque is out in the public daily sharing music with people. We exist now. We won’t exist forever. Our friend Forrest from San Diego put it perfectly. “I get to stand a few feet from you and watch you play. In the future people will wish they could have done that.” I want to create as much as I can while I’m alive so when I’m dead people will have a lot to listen to and read and watch. I think when we’re long gone people will tell themselves, “I would have supported them. I would have gone to see them and been a fan of their work.” But you know what? Most wouldn’t. Most people don’t know how to support something that isn’t officially condoned by others.

I write because I want my feelings and thoughts to be remembered for the future. I want people to know who I was and what I felt. I am a street performer when I should be singing in opera houses and concert halls. I have been shoved aside my whole life. The music I make with Thoth will probably never be heard by the vast majority of the world. I will work my entire life and make tons of art only to die with little recognition. Thoth has experienced the same, so no doubt it will be the same for me. He made 9 albums with his band and on his own even before he met me, all of which were self-released and very few copies exist. All of our 5 albums under Tribal Baroque are self-released, too. No major fanfare happens when we release them. A handful of people buy them, and then they just sit on our website. Easily accessible, but mostly unseen and unheard. There is a vast treasure trove of music for the world to discover someday, if they choose to. And we haven’t stopped yet. We’ll continue making albums until we’re both dead.

We don’t know how to make people like us or pay attention to us. We’re not good at marketing or selling what we do. We’re good at doing it. Honestly all great artists don’t know how to sell what they do. They know how to make art. Making art is the most important thing. What people think about it or how much recognition I have isn’t important, even though it’s hard sometimes to realize that. People put so much worth into what the world thinks about what one does. The most important things aren’t about how much money or fame or recognition one has, it’s about how one doesn’t ever give up and keeps doing what one want despite lack of recognition. That is where I take pride in. I don’t have much recognition for what I do, and yet I keep on doing it. When we’re gone it won’t be, “Wow they were so well respected and famous.” but “Wow they keep performing and singing and making art and music while being underrated and without major recognition or fame. How the hell did they do that?” We do it because we have to do it. Art is life.

The Best Prayformance Since Arriving in Lisbon

Sunday May 24th 2015

Before going out.

Before going out.

I was feeling better today. More relaxed. I got dressed all pretty. I had to show you the view we pass every day on our way to our spot. ———->>>

That’s the ocean out there. We always travel to seaside cities. Barcelona, Porto, Lisbon, New York, San Francisco, San Diego, etc. We feel trapped inland.

We got to our spot around 8 and the Juice Bar and Gardenia was already closed. Once the guard left, we set up and got started playing. We were scared the guard would come back and bother us, but he didn’t. At first, our crowds weren’t that big. I wasn’t expecting anything, as we’ve experienced Sunday’s being slow in the years past. Man, were we wrong. After a half hour of playing, we had the entire street packed with people trying to look in and watch us. We stand in the center now with our case in front of us. We used to have to play one on either side. I think being in the center creates more focus. I finally started to relax and had fun and be more animated. We finally got to play through the entire opera! I was so happy and relieved that we got through the entire weekend without being bothered. That’s what I hoped would happen! IMG_20150524_141859530 Our spot. IMG_20150524_142120935After prayformance poses.
IMG_20150524_142158009A man selling scarves on the sidewalk across from us came and sat next to us. “How long you play here?” he asked in broken English. “8:30 to 10.” Thoth said. “It very hard for me people looking at you. They don’t look at me.” he said. I immediately got annoyed and continued packing up. “That’s because we’re good at what we do.” Thoth said, but the man didn’t understand. “It very hard for me.” he continued saying. Thoth shrugged his shoulder and the man walked back to his scarves. We laughed about it. “It very hard for me.” I said with the man’s accent. Just as he left, a man and his young child came over to us. “We came just to see you.” the man said with the little girl clinging to his leg. “She wants to be just like you when she grows up. She told me I should get a skirt and dance around.” he said. How cute! “To think, in the same moment that scarf salesman was whining at us, they came over and said how much they love us!”

We wanted to go to the burger place down the street from home, but the line was too long, so we went to Nood again. I didn’t mind. Some people we hadn’t seen in a while were there. it really felt like old times. It was midnight before we got home.

We went home and I talked to my sister on Skype. She was very talkative and excited. I told her how happy and relieved I was. She was happy for me. I took a picture of Thoth holding Bunny. Sometimes, now that I use the camera phone, I’m able to get the sweetest shots of him. IMG_20150524_155449750Good night Bunny!

Thoth’s Family Visits!

Monday December 29th 2014

I got really excited this morning when it seemed we were going to TWO New Year’s Eve parties (I’m writing this the next day and it didn’t work out.) We ARE going to Scott Levkoff’s low key invite only party in SF to play. I’m excited. It’s been years since we were invited to play at a NYE party. So, yeah. That happened. Maybe we’ll do the other party next year.

Thoth’s family (which is now mine also) arrived at 1pm to visit. Cheryl (Thoth’s sister) Cheryl’s daughters Grace and Hyacinth and Hyacinth’s two boys Zach and Ben came. We talked about Thoth’s mom, ate and then played a fun game. They’re so sweet and have completely embraced me as part of the family. That feels so good. Cheryl said she loves reading my blog. I love when people say that. Hyacinth calls me Lilabug. 🙂 She loves me. I love my new family.

Hyacinth and me.

Hyacinth and me (taken by Cheryl.)

I was working on a drawing all day, but I still don’t like how it looks. Grace showed me some of her drawings. She’s a great artist. Around 5, everyone went home and Nana took us to the sauna in Piedmont for our hot tub. She gave us a gift certificate to go there for Christmas. I was a limp noodle when we finished. Nana picked us up and took us home, then went out dancing. I wrote to Chris and Khalil to see if we’re still having dinner tomorrow night. We planned to meet at Plearn for dinner. Nana will come, too. Thoth is going with Nana to get a massage tomorrow, which she also gave him as a Christmas gift. She’s so sweet. I drew and watched Titus into the evening. What a nice day! NYE in 2 days!