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How I Felt Today: Legendary!

Wednesday October 19th 2016

Today I felt something really amazing. I felt beautiful, like the inside of my heart and soul was on the outside, visible for others to see. It was as if I knew we are destined to be famous and loved throughout the world and respected as great artists in history. I knew from deep within myself that the people of this time who see me will someday say, “I saw them back when they was only performing in the parks.” I know that Dan Rubin’s pictures of us will be famous too because they will have documented us before our fame. By fame I don’t mean paparazzi following us around and being in stupid tabloid newspapers, I mean famous as in being legendary people who create music, art and live a creative life that many, many people respect, admire and love. We are already legendary. People say that to us. We are recognized in every city we perform in by people who have seen our work and love it.

People are afraid to let their truth shine. I am a loved and respected artist living an incredible live of inspiration and creativity. That is my truth. I inspire everyone who sees me. I either inspire them or challenge them. Today I was so inspired I had a blast getting ready to prayform. We had such a great two days off I felt happy, refreshed and beautiful! It was 80 degrees outside so I only wore my new floral top, my new floral panties and my new baby pink sneakers. I felt like a little pixie. I don’t really feel “feminine” with the way I dress, especially when I dress skimpily. I feel like a sexless Puckish pixie fairy alien angel creature.

12 3Getting to the park took longer than usual. People stared at me the whole way to the park. A family of women got on the train after us. The younger daughter saw me first and told her mom to look behind her. She did and then turned all the way around to stare at me. No one said anything. There I was, a little 28 year old girl walking around New York City in floral panties and painted hair. I felt very bold. Who walks around in their panties? The outfits I wear are as outrageous as anyone I’ve seen. I’m the person I want the world to be. Creative, open and free, which it is anything but!

We got to the park just in time and had a great prayformance for our first. We went crazy for our first four songs and the crowds were very responsive and supportive. A group of people had been waiting for us to begin and were the biggest applauders. Who knows how they knew us. Probably had seen us play at the Angel Tunnel before. By the end of playing Thoth was really tired. Dan and I did a photo shoot and we took the subway with him, got dinner and settled down for the evening. 4 5 6

Here’s a little vlog from my channel for you, too!

Sacred Expression

Wednesday October 12th 2016

I did makeup today. I liked it. Makeup gives me an opportunity to be more creative. It’s like painting or drawing, but on my face.1Our friends Cover Story were sangin away in the Angel Tunnel when we arrived. They always acknowledged us. Sweet. It was an… interesting day. We had a big crowd for “Anya,” but “Romanza” and “LA’s Waltz” gathered no crowd, literally. No one watched us. They walked past us as if we weren’t there. Not standing at a distance, no, not standing there at all. Like we were completely invisible to everyone for two entire songs. We suddenly had a crowd again for “Gypsy Dance.” It’s not us, it’s just the day!

We both had fun anyway. I was focused on being as expressive as I could. Our friend Eric and his best friend came to see us on their yearly walk through the park on Yom Kippur. They both knelt and listened to “Plucking Song” and the stood and clapped for “Sea Expressions.” Eric is such a supportive and inspiring friend. He inspires us. I wasn’t thinking so much about money, as we weren’t doing that well in that department today. I let myself do whatever I wanted in terms of expression, not caring if anyone liked it or not. I was inspired. That’s what prayformance is for. It’s a communion between me and the universe. Amazing we can make a living having a communion with the universe, with the earth and the sky and the birds and the trees and the people. When people treat it spiritually, it is. Prayformance is many things. Theater, music, dance, self expression, sacred expression, self therapy, performance, art, creative expression… 2 3We walked to the East Side and found a diner to have dinner at. Yum.

Amazing Easter Prayformance and Feeling Amazing!!!!!!!

Sunday March 27th 2016

Here’s a look at my makeup designs for the week.

Thursday’s makeup: (Only played two songs, but made a great vlog.)IMG_20160326_152611

Friday’s makeup: (A surprisingly good day with David doing more filming of us for the documentary. I was particularly creatively inspired and improvised a lot.)

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Saturday’s makeup: (A surprisingly amazing Saturday. Got better as the day went on. Big crowds.)IMG_20160326_152511

Sunday’s makeup: (Our big fans and good friends Ellen and John came from Oregon to join us for an amazing wonderful 2 and a half hour Easter prayformance!)

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What an amazing Sunny Bunny Hunny Easter Sunday!!! We really went for it today! I even drew a little sketch in the morning! I am a well rounded creative person. 🙂 I draw, do makeup, make my own outfits, sing, play violin, dance and act! I believe any true artist is skilled in many creative fields.

Why do I do such incredibly complicated makeup every day? Because I want to. I used to do it for others, now I do it for me. I don’t have to do complex makeup. It makes no difference in how people interact with us. It’s rare anyone compliments me on my designs. They’re too busy complimenting us on our singing. 🙂IMG_20160326_145438788IMG_20160326_145558678Our prayformance yesterday was great, but today was UH-mazing. We must seem like aliens from another planet! Seriously. People must think we dropped from the fucking sky. Who in the world puts on copious amounts of makeup and costumes and goes out in public and dances, plays violin and sings their fucking lungs out for 2 hours, or longer? On top of that playing completely original music? We played our one hour opera today, and played an hour and a half more of our old music! We improvised, too! When we have big audiences the entire time there’s no telling what we’ll do!IMG_20160326_181613568

The average witness to our work is completely uninformed. There’s tons of info about us online, but the average person watching us doesn’t know who we are, nor do they have a fucking clue what’s going on. On Sunday, an audience member didn’t know which case to put his tip in. He said, “Could I put it in either one, or are you guys separate?” That shows you. Nobody knows. People don’t know we’re married, or that we’ve been doing this work together 7 years (or Thoth alone had been doing it for 20 years), or where our music comes from, or where we’re from, or what we’re doing here, or why we’re doing this, or how it was created, or what they’re supposed to do or… They don’t know if they should clap or cheer or laugh or cry or scream or dance or run away or where they should stand. No. Fucking. Clue. The fact we’re able to do this and not do anything else is a fucking miracle. Yes, I said fuck. FUCK!

IMG_20160326_145504348There’s so much history behind what we do and how it was created. These days we’re getting a lot of that awe-inspired question “How? How did you create this?” It’s as though that question people can see and feel the depth of what we’re doing. If we become successful and famous there will be so much history for people to delve into. When I think of people who are famous, like famous singers, they weren’t doing their creative work as long as we have. I think eventually we will be so incredibly and profoundly good at what we do, the world won’t be able to ignore us anymore. We already are, but the world just isn’t ready for us yet. It will come in time.IMG_20160326_145739605

It’s interesting how depressed I was in January and February. Whenever I’m deeply depressed, something is coming that is always positive and good for us. That never fails. Right before our successful debut in Martha’s Vineyard I was so depressed, both years. When I’m that sad, I feel like nothing will change, that I’ll be sad forever. It’s hard when I’m in a pit remember to remember I can climb out and I will see the sunshine. IMG_20160327_214625836

I need to stop giving myself a hard time. We’re amazing. There’s no one like us in the whole fucking world.

From a fan who saw us on Sunday:

“Thank you for your dedicated art! Both of you are beautiful, powerful, talented and skilled. Such a treat to see you on Easter. Flow, share and bathe in all the massive success you two deserve!”

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

I am humbled by people’s appreciation of our work, but I also very much know we are deeply worthy of it. Yay!

Vlogs will be posted soon. Here’s one from Saturday, in case you haven’t seen it.

Alien Love Goddess!!

Thursday October 29th 2015

I was antsy to prayform after being trapped in the house all day during yesterday’s storm, so I really went full bore with my costume and makeup. I think “Alien Love Goddess” is a suitable title for today’s look. I’m quite pleased that in addition to singing I create all my looks myself.unnamed-4

Someone dropped a note in our case after “Anya.”

“Thank you both, hearted heartfullness! So beautiful to see you in the beauty wood today. I’ve been a fan for years and always freshly grateful for your energy.” -Bethany I.

A couple bought a CD that were really loving our work. “Your music is amazing. Your voice is haunting.” the husband said. I love when people really get us after their first listen.unnamed-1

Dan Rubin came to see us and take pictures. I was glad to be so prettied up. “Your makeup is extra special today.” he said. “You’re all coordinated.” Dan is the most prolific photographer of our/Thoth’s work. He’s taken pictures of Thoth since he first started performing at the Angel Tunnel in 1999. We are so lucky that he loves us enough to come out to see us two to three times a week with his camera. That’s more than anyone does in the world, as far as I know. Despite how great he is at making amazing photos, he’s incredibly humble. There aren’t many photographers like him. We’re lucky to have him in our lives. “The feeling’s mutual.” Dan said.unnamed-2

It was a pretty slow day, and quite noisy around the tunnel, but I gave it my all. I remembered my favorite actor and how he always gives it his all despite whatever is happening. I know that people are mesmerized by us, but most of the time they quietly watch and don’t say anything. Our experience of a prayformance is so different from what the people watching experience. We have to transmute all the energy around us into a heartfelt, emotional, soulful musical performance. It’s hard work. unnamed-3

When we got home, we got some sweet messages from people who had seen us in the park today.

“This afternoon I was passing by Bethesda Fountain on my way toward the stairs to street level, doing the typical New Yorker Who Won’t Slow Down thing, and then I heard you guys in the “Angel Tunnel” and was quite literally stopped in my tracks, where I remained for a while, somewhat slack jawed and in awe. Keep on doing what you’re doing, altering the course of people’s lives, if even for just ten minutes at a time. You’re stunning, brilliant, and rejuvenating.” – Jodi V.unnamed-6

“Tribal Baroque, your exercise is beyond the scope of imagination of most people on the planet. You guys vibrate on a plane that is astounding. You present yourselves in the most vulnerable environment a performer can choose. The street. No filters of posters, brochures, ticket takers, theatres, all the shit that gets people ready for an event. You guys are the it, the raw beautiful it no holds barred, It’s astounding really. Magic. Some people will take years to process what they have seen when they see you. Some people not at all. And some people get it immediately and can’t believe their good fortune that you exist and perform with this abandon that is tethered to the earth and stars! That is all!” – Howard B.unnamed-7

It’s good to know how much people love what we do! Thank you!unnamed-8

“I thought you were a doll.”unnamed-5ALL PHOTOS BY DAN RUBIN

Feeling Creative on a Low

Thursday October 22nd 2015

Dan Rubin came to see us again today. It’s great to see him two days in a row! “I felt very pretty.” I said. “That reminds me of a song.” Dan said. 🙂 We do a dance with Dan. It’s wonderful. _IGP3521 _IGP3528

The energy around today’s prayformance was pretty slow. It was low pressure, but I tried to keep my energy up and sing my best. Thoth always does. My voice felt strong and healthy. It takes so long for me to fully get over a cold. When I’m finally healthy, it’s only me who can tell. _IGP3490_IGP3426

Near the end of prayformance, I heard loud music, like the break dancers make. Turns out two instrumentalists were blaring their acoustic guitars from some small amps just outside the tunnel. Thoth went over to ask them to turn it down. They said we’d been playing for an hour and a half and it was their turn now. I’ll never understand why people are so inconsiderate. It would have been much nicer for them to come over and ask when we’re finished. Street performers need to work together._IGP3531

Despite this getting us upset, I tried to count my blessings today. Sure, we didn’t have big crowds and were stopped early, but it’s amazing I get to sing in Central Park for a living. If I ever went back to the tunnel when I was old I won’t remember the bad days, I will remember the beauty. Singing into my husbands eyes, seeing the birds flying around the Angel Fountain, the color of the trees turning orange and gold, the beautiful variations of clouds against the bright blue sky, the people’s faces that were touched by our music, the crowds, the cheering. I will be stunned that I was so blessed to live a life like this. I pray it will never end._IGP3556

I always want to prayform, even until my death, as Thoth does. I don’t know how that will be possible. I feel that when Thoth passes, prayformance would be gone, but I have no idea what’s going to happen. If someone had told me 10 years ago I’d have done all the things I’ve done so far, I wouldn’t have believed them. I cherish all the memories I have with Thoth. I cherish every good day, and bad ones too, because the bad days help me appreciate the good days. 🙂_IGP3562Tomorrow there is another. _IGP3608ALL PHOTOS BY DAN RUBIN.