Speak Lila'Angelique

26.1.2012

We’ve been playing for three days in the courtyard. Still not sure if it’s consistent. Yesterday I was really pissing sad, and I made myself sadder by talking about it. We’ve been kicked out, harassed, or arrested in every fucking place we’ve ever played. New York, Amsterdam, Barcelona, Marrakesh, Sintra, Lisbon, San Diego, San Francisco… Will we ever be WELCOMED for once?!

Last show at Art Lab on Saturday. I think we’ll have a full house.

We are blessed to be doing what we’re doing, but just to imagine if we could play in all the places we’ve found in the world without being stopped!

I am so looking forward to going back to Europe, though. I think we should invade the smaller towns.

This is the first photo I’ve found of me in the Angel Tunnel.

24.1.2012

Bought our tickets to Europe yesterday! Stressful. It is amazing we can manifest what we want though. It always works the same way. We’re constantly talking about where we want to travel. When we perform, people ask “Where are you going next?” and we say “We’re planning on flying to Europe in the spring.” The more we say it, the more it sinks in until we buy the tickets and go. We just keep talking about it until it happens.

I’m so nervous about money. I really hope we start making money soon. We went to the park to play today. Even though it started out slow, we eventually gathered a huge crowd. We played fully and passionately, but made little money. A Frenchman took a video and photos of us on Sunday. I was amazed to see Thoth and I spin in unison! Same foot pattern and everything. Here’s the link:

Copyright TomPic

I also got some photos of me with Kirby!

Copyright TomPic

Copyright TomPic

Send me a message if you have any ideas of places to stay or play in Europe.

21.1.2012

From when I was about 11, I wanted to be this girl.

The character’s name is Zoe, from Cirque Du Soleil’s Quidam. She’s played by Audrey Brisson-Jutras, who was 12 at the time. She’s such a pretty 12 year old! I was a mess at that age. I guess a little lighting and make up can go a long way. I was so jealous of this girl. She had such a sweet voice, and her father was the music creator of the show!
I took the name Zoe when I first went to high school. I so wanted to play this role. I was called by a Cirque talent scout when I was 16 and got to record the Quidam songs in my dad’s studio. I sent them in and was invited to a singing audition in Florida when I was 19. I was the last to audition. I sang two classical pieces. I didn’t know how to belt or improvise, which was necessary to get hired. They were impressed with me though and gave some tips to learn improvisation. I remember watching the talent scouts walk away in the rear view mirror of my car.  It was an amazing experience non less. I now love improvisation and love using my belt voice. But now I am creating my own show.

20.1.2012

Today was hard. My dad’s mom died today. I wasn’t close to her at all. All of my grandparents are dead now accept for my mom’s mom. I though she’s be the first to go. I’m not really close to any of them. My mom really wants me to come home and visit her. I don’t want to. Last time I was home was a disaster. Mom would be so upset if I didn’t go see her before we left for Europe. I hesitant know about buying tickets. It’s such a big expense and we’re not bringing in much money right now. I am trying to create a story line for our show at Queen Bee’s next month. It’s frustrating.

Thoth just danced to some classical music. It was so pretty. I’m playing Jim’s piano a lot. Jut improvising and creating ostenatos. No singing, though. I’m still not able to sing fully. Hopefully I’ll feel better tomorrow night and lots of people will come to our third show at Art Lab.

I dyed my hair a brighter pink tonight.Yesterday it was faded to really light blond.The day before it was my favorite color. Light baby pink. Very subtle. Matches my headdress…I like how it fades and changes colors.

All for now….

16.1.2012

Ah! What a wonderful day! We modeled for Andrea Rushing (http://andrearushingfinearts.com/index.html) who has a studio across the street from Art Lab. He adores us, to put it mildly. “I’m going to paint a masterpiece.” he said while taking photos of us. He is a brilliant fine artist. I love inspiring people. Andrea offered us free classes in exchange for modeling. I’ve always wanted to learn how to paint! I didn’t get to see Kirby today. It was too cold in the park for the birds. We’re doing a big show at Queen Bee’s on February 24th. I’m really excited about it. We have so much support here! Jim makes all our cards and CDs and promotion for us. He is so generous and is very comfortable having us stay here. He is a great friend and supporter.

Tonight I drew Lon Cheney as Erik, The Phantom of the Opera.It looks better in person! I love his eyes though. It’s my task to discover the subjects eye in the paper. I found a lot of Phantom artwork online last night. Very inspiring.  I think God, whoever that is, sent me Thoth to be my Phantom. Phantom, the story and the character, saved my life. But that’s a story for another blog… Stay tuned…

I love my hair right now. It’s a beautiful cotton candy pink. Can you see it peeking out under my headdress?

Till next time….

I held Kirby, the White Umbrella Cockatoo, for a long time today at the park. He was screaming his head off on his perch because he wanted my attention. Then his owner, Greg, gave him to me. We snuggled and kissed for a long time. I love the feeling of the birds tongues and I love their eyes. Kirby’s eye half close when I hold him. It’s really cute. I’m missing him right now. I would love to have a bird. Greg knows I’m not up for the responsibility yet. Having a bird is like having a baby. I didn’t know cockatoos were so cuddly! The trainers say Kirby isn’t like that with everyone. He really likes me. I mean, I do look like a cockatoo. Greg says Kirby thinks I’m his girlfriend. Kirby’s just like any 17 year old boy. He made kissing sounds with me, sang with me (and squawked really loud for a bit) and growled with me. I could snuggle him to my chest and hug him forever. I’m missing having a pet.

I think we’re figuring out how to play in the park… we’re tricky!

15.1.2012 LALALA!

Just did our show. Wow. Lots more people attended. I’m so happy to wear my costume again! “I feel pretty… oh so pretty…” James and Chet played guitar with us. I love improvising dynamically. Our beautiful friend Behin DANCED! YAY! I love when people dance! My voice was spent by the end. I coughed up phlegm the whole time. Ick! Both Tony and Peter came again. Tony is a throat singer. He told me about a resonant space he built with a friend. Sounds interesting… Tony said he’s been singing along to our CD! I love hearing stories like that! Peter is an interesting man who said he’s working with a Cirque Du Soleil type show. Want’s us to be involved. Hmmm…. I was looking at tickets to Europe before the show. Still trying to decide when to buy. The prices are pretty low now. We were really lucky last year. We bought  tickets three weeks in advance. When we arrived in Switzerland, the border patrol guy was mean because we didn’t have return tickets. “You can only stay here three months!” he snapped. But he let us through anyway. Then almost exactly a year later we were flown to Sao Paulo and back to New York by Red Bull! I wonder what will happen this year… It’s all so…. confusing!

14.1.2012

I love you all. I don’t know what I’m doing. I am following my heart. I love someone I want to live my life with. I want him to be happy. I love being with him. I love singing. I love being free. I think love is worth fighting for. Love or fame? That shouldn’t even be a question. Love is a personal, humble, gentle, understanding, sacrificing, sweet, comforting, kind, difficult, painful and beautiful journey… fame is all about self, deception, lies, pain, suffering. Love can be everlasting, fame is not. I will not sacrifice my humanity for fame.

13.1.2012

Everything has been up in the air. We don’t know where we were living or how we’ll survive here. I’ve been dilapidated since last Saturday and not able to do much of anything. I was sick last month! I’ve felt intrusive at Jim’s house, since we only asked to stay three days at first and are sleeping in his living room. He doesn’t seem to mind at all though. He’s so sweet and caring. “I like having you here.” Jim really has saved us. I’m finally getting better. Thoth and I went to the park and he did a walk about. I dressed up and handed out cards but didn’t sing. We made some friends. The tarot reader in the park really doesn’t like us. Last year he thought we set up on him and made a stink about it. I wouldn’t be surprised if he has been calling the rangers on us. I actually think we could have a lot of fun walking through the park playing. The most important thing to do is to play. Things only happen when we play. We haven’t done a walk about since Marrakesh! I do love walk abouts. There is something freeing about. We’re not burdened by anything. I feel blessed we have been protected by Jim, Emily, Jason, Daniel, and Dave these past two weeks. I got to hold an assortment of birds today in the park. They are so sweet. There is a white umbrella cockatoo who loves me. He makes kissie sounds and almost purrs when I pet him. I got to hold a little bird who “kisses” me. Basically she bites my lip and tries to pick the skin off. I like it though. Her tongue feels strange. I got pooped on the first time today. We’re going to go and do a walk about in the park tomorrow and our Art Lab show is tomorrow night.